babyferaligator:

*steals ur girl* *mom finds out and makes me return her and apologize*

(Source: 420dongsquad, via gnarly)

satans-nipples:

i put headphones in 20 minutes ago and forgot to play music: a novel by me

(Source: uhmonda, via shouldnt)

moldydrugs:

Is there anything better than pussy?

(via neatpotatoes)

jonasnightingay:

if you mock someone for praying or finding comfort/purpose in their religion then you are a gross person

(via asian)

hotboysofficial:

"I have read the Terms and Conditions"image

(via pizza)

emmugh:

I like new friends because I can reuse old jokes

(via sniffing)

particlefucker:

dont let tumblr make you believe that

-eating car hubcaps is cool

-being an inanimate object is acceptable

-post-avant jazzcore is better than progressive dreamfunk

-having a corporeal form is healthy

-france exists

-chemtrails aren’t real

(Source: v0idfucker, via teamfreekickass)

timeywimeyhobbit:

why does my body keep  producing acne why can’t you focus on more important things like growing wings or making me hot 

(via guy)

remyreaper:

waltdisnerd:

battbaby:

With out sound his lips read
‘You piece..of poo poo’

image

I FORGOT HOW TO BREATHE

(via joshpeck)

dutchster:

when you have the hiccups while trying to sleep

image

(via stability)